Stay
by Dyng Rose
Summary: And off he goes, back to pretending he’s happy with his little mock family. I watch him go, I can never stop staring. Reno/Cloud, M.
1. Chapter 1

Stay

He always looks so young when he sleeps. It's almost like all that thinking he does all day, all those memories he tries to forget slip away. Almost. Problem right now is that he's not asleep, and he knows I'm not either.

Cloud has never been a cuddler; neither have I, for that matter. I need my space when I sleep, since I tend to turn and kick a lot. It suits me just fine that there's a good two feet between us on my bed. But when I wake up in the middle of the night, like I do every night, he's always clinging to his pillow. Maybe it's not so much that he's not a cuddler as he just never cuddles _me_. Again, I don't really mind, but I can't help but wonder if he's ever cuddled her. Probably.

He looks at me and sees me watching him. He never asks why I'm staring, because I always am. Not in public, of course, but here, I can't keep my eyes off him. His eyes meet mine and I know what he wants, what he always wants from me, what he only wants from me.

In a second I'm pinned to the bed, and he's exploring my mouth with his tongue. I try to take charge of the kiss, of at the very least the kiss, but no, he won't let me, and I quickly give in. He always has to be in control, to be top, and he's so damned forceful about it I almost always end up with bruises on my arms, waist, and thighs. I tried dominating him once. I got so far as holding his wrists above his head before I was thrown to the floor and he was storming out. Never tried that again; moody bastard.

His lips start to pull away, and when I try to follow he grips my hair to keep me still, hard. See what I mean about control? I think he gets off on it. But hey, as long as I get off with him I'm not complaining.

His other hand is roughly probing into me, checking to see if I'm still lubed up enough for another go tonight. Apparently he's satisfied with what was left from a few hours before, because he's suddenly inside. That's another thing about Cloud, no foreplay, no prep past lubricating, just straight to the point. He wraps his arm around my waist, simultaneously holding me still while angling so he can push in as deep as possible.

Maybe I should back up to how this all started. To be honest, I have absolutely no idea. He just showed up at Healin one day, I think he was supposed to be making a delivery for Rufus, but I never asked, and he started screaming at me. For the life of me I can't remember what about. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that I scratched his bike with my bike the day before when I parked outside the bar, but I never thought he'd notice. Maybe he had a fight with his girlfriend that morning or something. Oh, yeah, he has a girlfriend; Lockhart finally got her huge tits on him after that whole Kadaj incident. Anyway, he comes in screaming at me about Gaia knows what, I start shouting back, and next thing I know I'm bent over the dining room table with my pants around my ankles and he's pounding away.

Kind of like what he's doing now. One hand is still pulling my hair, while the other is digging finger nails into my hip bone, probably going to draw blood soon if it hasn't already, but I don't notice any of this. The angle he's fucking at lets him hit that one spot every time, and soon I'm writhing and gasping. I try not to moan; whenever I start he'll do one of three things: One, he'll flat out tell me to shut up, two, he'll grip my hair harder or squeeze my arm or leg or something to shut me up, or three, he'll just stop altogether. I really hate when he does that last one, so I try to keep my moaning in check. He likes me silent as well as immobile.

As he's approaching his climax he speeds up, and I know my cue. I reach down and start stroking myself. He finally let go of my hair so he can grab my hips with both hands, pulling me into him as he thrusts as hard as possible, and I swear this time he might rip me in half. Now that my head is free I can inflict some damage of my own. As my orgasm hits me full force, I bite down onto his shoulder. I don't know if it's the bite or my muscles clamping down on him that sends him over the edge, but quickly he's grunting in my ear while his fingers dig into me again. I think it was the bite. He never objects to my teeth or finger nails. He gets off on it; some weird, masochistic thing, I think.

We both collapse, panting, and he rolls off of me. As always, there is now two feet between us again. I immediately roll onto my side, back toward him, and try to go back to sleep. That's when his phone starts ringing. Guess who that must be? He reaches down to the floor and pulls the phone out of his pants.

"Hello?" He actually answers his phone, which can only mean Lockhart is on the other end. "Yeah, I just go into town…. It went okay…. I just stopped to eat something…. Alright, I'll be home in an hour…. You too. Bye." How he managed to get his breathing under control so quickly is beyond me.

He cleans himself up, gets dressed, and is out the door in two minutes. No goodbye, no "Thanks for a good time, Reno, I'll be back later," which he will. Not even a pat on the head, "Good fuck toy." That's how it always is with him, a quick fuck, maybe a nap, then out the door. The only words he ever says are orders, "Stop squirming," "Shut up," and so on.

I roll onto my back and stare at the ceiling. We never touch, we never talk, and yet every time he leaves my bed feels so…empty. Sighing, I clean myself up with the tissues on the night stand, and then find my pants and my cigarettes. Out on the deck, I watch him start up his bike. He catches sight of my lighter and turns to give me a quick cold look. Immediately I turn away to take a long drag. Fuck him, I don't need him to say goodbye, he can glare at me all he wants. I wouldn't even be out here right now if it weren't for Rufus' stupid rule of no smoking in the house.

And off he goes, back to his wannabe wife, back to that orphan boy living with them, back to pretending he's happy with his little mock family. Of course, I watch him go, I can never stop staring.

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A/N: If I ever manage to finish part 2 (which I"ve been trying to for months) I'll post it. Maybe some reviews would help me along? If not, I think this does fine as it is. Let you interpret Cloud's bastard quality as you like. Strangely, I actually like this bit, so let me know if you agree or not.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Wow, I actually finished something. This is part 2 of what will be a three part series. Not much to say about it, so go ahead and read.

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Two weeks. He hasn't come back for two weeks. I don't care, I shouldn't care, but I can't stop myself from looking up whenever someone opens the door. After the third time this has happened in one day, Tseng is eyeing me with that, "I know what you did, and I _highly_ disapprove" look.

"What the fuck are you looking at?" I snapped at him as I stomped out the door. Over observant bastard who thinks he knows everything. I'd kill him if he weren't right. Something you should know when it comes to Tseng and me, he knows me inside and out. He was the one who recruited me to the Turks, trained me, and has kept me working directly under him ever since I was initiated. He can read me perfectly with less than a glance. I gave up trying to hide anything from him years ago.

I stood on the deck, in the same spot I did that night, and lit up again. Damn chocobo-headed bastard. Usually he's back within five days for another ride, whether it be because he's coming back into town from a delivery or he had a fight with his girl; something always brings him back. So I can't stop wondering why he's staying away.

"He's using you, Reno." I think I jumped about a foot in the air. Tseng comes to stand next to me, not making one stupid creek in the wood. I believe that Turks should not use Turk tricks on other Turks, such as sneaking up on them without making a damned sound. Tseng does not share this belief, obviously.

"And how is this any of your business?" Just because I gave up on hiding from him doesn't mean I can't tell to butt-the-hell-out.

He cocks an eyebrow at me. "It's my business because one of my Turks is distracted. I shouldn't need to explain to you what happens to a distracted Turk."

"It's not like we do anything these days, anyway. The most exciting mission I've been on in weeks is going out to Junon to get Rufus' fancy imported coffee. And I am not distracted!" Though my snide remarks have been off lately.

Of course, he chooses to ignore my outburst. "Regardless of what your assignments have been, something could happen that will require your full attention. Not only are you utterly useless if distracted, but it makes you a liability. You could get one of your team mates injured or worse. You-"

"Yeah, yeah, I get it. Cloud makes me a shit Turk. What am I supposed to do about it?"

"I believe you know the answer to that, Reno. He is with Miss Lockhart and has been for more than a year. Strife hasn't been to see you in two weeks, and when he does see you it's for a quick release before he's gone again. He's using you. Either handle the situation or find some way to keep it from interfering with your job performance." And with that he turns on his heel and marches back into the house. I guess I pissed him off somehow.

I take another drag and look out over the forest around Healin, thinking over what he said.

Cloud was using me. No shit, I knew that since day one. Why else would he keep me so quiet? He's pretending I'm someone else. The only thing I don't know is why. Why is he coming to see me when he has someone who looks like Lockhart? Maybe that's it, he doesn't _have_ her. Maybe Miss Wholesome won't put out without a ring, though I doubt even she can be that innocent after everything. No, that can't be it. Maybe she's not kinky enough for him. I mean, he and I may not use whips and chains, but I can't see her biting him as hard as I do, or him being as rough with her as he is with me. As if he would ever taint those perfect breasts of hers with bite marks or bruises, the way he does to my entire body.

Well, whatever the reason, he hasn't wanted more for two weeks, longer than he's ever stayed away before.

I don't care. At least, not in the way you think I do. Despite how impersonal and controlling he is, he's a damned good lay.

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A/N: Short, I know, but part three will be just a bit longer. It's all written, but it's unedited as of now. I promise it will be up as soon as it's been looked over and all that, which could take about a week or two, but it _will_ be posted. So go ahead and review if you like, let me know what you thought of this chapter, it was really hard to write. Tseng didn't agree with me a lot. But anyway, if you liked it, let me know, if you didn't, let me know ways to improve.

By the way, if you don't like the way this story is continueing, or just would like a different perspective, a reader called Warratah has written a different version for a sequel, the link to which can be found on my profile. Go check it out.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: This entire story is hereby dedicated to Strange and Intoxicating –rsa- for all of her help and taking time out of her busy schedule to beta for me. This would be of a lower quality if it weren't for her and how much she helped when I got stuck or something was a bit OOC, or flat, or wordy.

And now part 3 of Stay

* * *

Three weeks, three days. Three fucking weeks and three Gaia-damn days. I don't miss him. Well, maybe about seven inches of him, but that's it. I roll over to check the clock on my nightstand. 5 AM. I've been lying here for 3 hours trying not to think about him. Imagine my success.

Fuck it, I need a cigarette. Outside is warm and so quiet I can hear the slightest rustle of underbrush in the woods around Healin. That is, until the distant rumbling disturbs everything. I'd know that rumbling anywhere-the Chocobo has returned.

He drives up to the deck and heads straight for me. I take a long drag as I watch him approach, and he gives me that disgusted look.

"I hate those things." Wow, an actual sentence that's not an order. This must be my lucky day. I blow smoke at him in response, and his nose wrinkles. "They make your mouth taste like tobacco."

"Why should I care if you like the way I taste?"

"Well, as I'm the one screwing you, I think I should have a say." He actually took the cigarette from my mouth when he said that. What the hell?

"Hey, where do you get off-" but I don't get to finish my sentence, since the next moment his tongue is down my throat. In another act of defiance, at least in my mind, I groan deeply and wrap his spikes around my fingers. He presses me against the wall and grabs hold of my thighs, wrapping my legs around him. I groan louder as my neglected cock responds quickly. I wonder how Rufus and Tseng would react if we just fucked here, against the wall? The thought makes me chuckle, resulting in Cloud leaving finger tip shaped bruises on my thighs.

My mind is torn between two impulses: I am a Turk and I have my pride. He was using me, I knew. Quick fucks a couple times a week, then going back to his _real family_. Then he ditches me for three weeks, and now he expects me to comply just like that? I'm not his plaything, to be used and tossed aside at will. The other bit of my mind, and guess where that bit is located, is screaming at me to shut up and just enjoy the way he's grinding again my hips. Currently, that bit is winning.

I tilt my head back as he attacks my neck with his lips and a bit of teeth. I run my hands up and down his bare arms while he unbuttons my shirt. Even if it weren't that warm out, I wouldn't have been cold when he got my shirt open. His warm tongue running over my chest made sure of that. I started to unzip his vest when he drops me back on my feet and pins my hands back to the wall.

He stands back a bit and looks me up and down. "Bed" is all he says before releasing me and heading into the lodge. Ah, back to the orders, are we? And that's another arguing point for the first half of my mind.

When we get back to my room, he immediately grabs my waist and pushes my chest against the door. My shirt is now on the floor with one hand pinning both of mine above my head while the other worked at my pants. Okay, I'm all for rough play normally, but this is just getting insulting. Damnit, I'm not his toy.

I wrench my hands free of his, turn around and push him off me hard enough that he trips and lands on the floor. We glare at each other for a second before I bend down to pick up my shirt. "Get out."

"What?"

"I said get out." I held the door open for him, waiting for him to take the damn _hint_ and leave. He stands up and stares at me, half confused and half exasperated; and maybe another half still lustful, but that half was out of luck.

"After not getting laid in three weeks, I would have thought you'd be dying for it."

That smug bastard! As if he's getting satisfactory screws. If he were, he wouldn't be coming to see me. Fine then, let's see how he holds up without me.

"Who the hell do you think you are? I don't see you for three weeks and then you stomp up to my door at five in the damn morning and expect me to just lay back and spread my legs for you? Well, fuck you! I'm not your fuck toy and I'm not going to sit quietly and let you have your fun! I'm not just-"

"Tifa wants to get married." Whoa. That came out of nowhere. So he's going to make it official, huh? Marry Mss Tits and adopt the little boy, eh? Then he's definitely leaving now.

"Then what are you doing here? If you're gonna get married, what the hell are you trying to nail me for? You have no right being here, no right doing this to me." Have you ever had one of the moments where you tell your mouth to shut the hell up but it just won't listen? "I'm not doing this anymore, Strife. I'm not gonna sit here like an obedient dog waiting for its master to play with it. And I sure as hell am not going to be your damn mistress, so you can just get the fuck out of my house."

Cloud had stood up during my rant, and now he was looking at me funny. "I said no."

Ummm, huh? "You what?"

"I told her no. I said I didn't want to get married and we broke up." Damn, how do I react to that?

"That still doesn't explain what you're doing here." As long as he was in a talking mood I was going to get all the information out of him I could.

"I'm here because…because I wanted to see you." Wanted to screw me, more like. "I don't love Tifa; it wouldn't be fair to marry her out of obligation." Is that why he was dating her? "So I broke it off. She'll get over it. I came back here because…I don't know. I just wanted to." He was looking sideways out of my window when he said all this. I'm not sure what to make of it. He wanted to? Well, yeah, free lay, no strings attached? Who wouldn't want that? Still, he looks a little lost. Maybe he doesn't want that? But if he wanted more, he should have stuck with Lockhart. He may be the only person I'm sleeping with, and I use the term lightly, but I'm not about to become all sweetie deary darling with him, or anyone for that matter.

His brow is furrowed slightly over his mako blue eyes that right now look sad and angry. The frown on his lips is familiar, but still troubling. And here I am, staring at him again. I huff and look away, out the same window he's gazing out of. This movement catches his eye and he sighs.

"I'll go then." I don't know whether to let him go or not. Okay, he ditched Lockhart, but he's still been a bastard to me. Now he wants to come see me. Why? Ah hell, I can find out later.

As he starts to pass me, I shut the door and have him pinned against it in one fluid movement. He grunts in surprise but reacts almost immediately. He wraps his arms around my waist and has me on the bed in half a second with his lips covering mine. My shirt lay forgotten somewhere on the floor and I work to remove his vest. Soon, we are completely naked and his fingers are pushing into me. I gasp in slight pain since it had been a while, and that seems to remind him of the necessity of lubrication. He fumbles around in my drawers and brings out the tube before repeating the action. Better.

Then he's in me. I groan loudly but this time he doesn't do anything to stop me. Fast, hard, and needy, we clutch at each other and gasp and moan and push and thrust until we both reach our climax simultaneously. We lay panting on the bed, side by side, not curled up together like a couple usually would be, but there doesn't seem to be that wall between us anymore, either. That's good enough for me.

"Alright then," I say between pants, "you can stay." He actually chuckles at that. He rolls onto his side, facing me, and snuggles into his pillow. I watch him as he falls asleep, a small smile touching my own face. The customary two feet is still between us, but that's the way I like it. I'm not much of a cuddler. I drift off myself soon afterward, confident that in the morning, I'll find that he did stay.

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A/N: I actually really liked the way this story turned out, which is very rare for me. I would love to know your final thoughts and opinions, even if they're negative; concrit is much appreciated and let me know if there's something that needs improving.

Once again, to read Warratah's version of the ending, check out my profile for the link.

Much love!


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